Wednesday, January 25, 2012

What Adoptive Moms Want Birth Moms to Know

Caden's adoption was finalized on December 16th. What a wonderful Christmas present to our family!  I wrote a letter to the birthmother a few weeks ago, but thought it might be helpful to share some of what I wrote to her with readers of my blog.

Here are a few things I think most adoptive mothers want birthmothers to know.

1. We know you love your baby. There is not a doubt in my mind that any mother who chooses adoption for her child adores that baby. Allowing another family to care for your child is NEVER an act of selfishness. It's the opposite-the most selfless thing anyone can do.

2. You will always be your baby's birth mother. I'll be his mom, yes, but nothing will change the fact that you gave him life.

3. We hold you in high esteem. It takes a strong woman to choose adoption, and I'm amazed by every one of you who has.

4. You are a WONDERFUL birthmother. Don't believe the lie that you're not a good mother if you choose adoption. You ARE. You are giving your child the best life possible.

5. THANK YOU. I cannot say it enough. You have changed our lives. You are the answer to our prayers. God has used your gift to heal our broken hearts. I pray for you every day, that God will bless your life so much for what you've given us. And I pray that someday, when the time is right, you'll be able to birth and raise another child. You deserve it.

To those of you who have adopted, anything else you can think of?

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